Staying on a bridge
by Kmyleprovost
Summary: After the events of Crossing a bridge, Steve and Stiles meet again


The text came a week later. "I wanted to thank you again and for you to have my number, if you ever need anything, don't hesitate to call". It was signed a simple "Steve" and haven't been followed by anything else. And for two months, Stiles never thought about using it. But when he was overwhelmed again by guilt and regret while seeing the avengers battling on TV one evening, he reached for his phone: "Still here if you need to talk. Hope everything is alright." Three hours later, an answer came: "are you busy?" "See you in 15 minutes at Starbucks at the foot of the Empire State Building?" "Okay".

When Stiles arrived at the café, it was not as busy as he suspected. An eye to his watch told him that the tardiness of their meeting might provide less of a wait, a quick look around assuring him that they were lucky enough to have hours before the closing, thanks to being so close to a tourist attraction. Sensing the approach of Steve, he turned around, greeting the other man with a smile. Steve looked tired and tense, but the look in his eyes and the sentiments he projected were far more desperate than that.

"Shall we?"

Steve only shrugged his shoulders before following Stiles to pass his command. When they were served, they found a table and sit down in silence. After five minutes, during which Steve only grew tenser, Stiles broke it and asked:

"So, how are you?"

Silence and then

"Tired. Exhausted even."

"Why?"

"I… I work in a team. We have to go to battle and I have to… guide them during it."

A silence.

"Like in the army. So, you have to give them orders?"

"Yes. And... Sometimes I have to give orders that put them in danger, you know, that put them at risks. I… had to do that today. Thankfully, nothing serious happened but… We came a long way. It took time for them to trust me enough not to discuss orders. So, when I have to take those decision, I can't let them see that I am doubting those choices. And… it's tiring. I'm tired."

Stiles took a drink before answering.

"Your friends, they're the one that you contacted the other day, right?"

"Hmm. Yes"

"And you really think that if you show them that you are human outside of battle they will discuss your orders on the field?"

"It's not that. It's more that if they know I will be looked at differently and they will begin to doubt that I can lead them. And we all have some strong personalities, we clash already quite frequently so…"

"Okay. I will take a wild guess and tell you that you need vacations. Take a few weeks and go. Seriously, you need to think of yourself firstly here. Because you didn't follow the one I gave you before. You continue to think of them before yourself. Seriously. If you think only of you right now, what would you do?"

"You don't understand, I have things I need to do. I have responsibilities."

"Okay, bad choice of question. Let me try again. If I was the one telling you what you just told me, what would you told me to do? Take it all and burying it?"

Before Steve opened his mouth he added:

"Don't answer, think about it. And let me tell you a story. There once was a boy, a teenager, really. Not really bad but not too good either. Too curious for his own good. And this boy, this boy chose to go look for a dead body in the woods with his best friend, his brother. But something happened there that give amazing powers to his friend and put him in danger ways. Now, this boy wouldn't let his brother alone against this. He followed his friend, tried to help him, keeping him away from trouble, trying to convince him to have allies. And finally, after many dangers and adventures, the friend just kind of feel tired about everything. Because each time he put himself, with only his normal, fragile self, in danger to save his friend, he never received a thank you. Never been recognized for what he did. Even been forgotten multiple times while in danger to the benefit of the new friends of his superhuman friend. But he was happy because his brother finally had the many friends he deserved, the girlfriend of his dreams. Even if himself was forgotten and left alone to survive. With only his father to worry about and confide in. Do you know what this guy did? He seeked the company of someone being left on the side too. Who knew what it was like. And they became close, the family they never knew they could have again. And life was good again. Then other problems arised that definitively cut the links with his former brother, the links too damaged to be saved."

"So what? I need to find someone like me?"

"No. You have multiple people suffering like you are. But you need to have the courage to take the decision to do what is better for yourself. This boy chose to cut all contact with his friends except one. But you can take a different path and just take some steps back and take the time to see what you want. This guy understood that putting your friends before yourself wasn't a good choice, not for himself but not for them either. Because they never knew they were losing him. And they weren't really able to confide in him anymore because they couldn't see him anymore, the real him, the one they had a bond with. A friendship, even with a power imbalance like yours his built on, it needs works from all parts. Because asking them to put faith in you and your decision, it's asking them to give you a big part of themselves. And you have to give them something too. But not the attention or the help you think they need. They need to be able to give you attention and help too. It works two ways."

Steve hummed at that, not convince. So Stiles added:

"What would you have advised to this boy?"

"To talk to his brother. And keep the friendship he built with the guy he met after. To build this one better than the other. And keep fighting for what really count for him, but to stop fighting all the battles and just…"

"Just what? Think about himself?"

Steve smiled depreciably.

"I took this one on myself, right?"

Stiles smiled in return.

"Maybe. Or maybe you just needed someone to remind you that taking care of yourself is not selfish but can help take care of others better."

"Maybe."

They finished their coffee in silence. The place was getting emptier by the minutes. They decided to take a walk to breathe a little. After a few, Stiles asked:

"You feel lighter, somehow. Did you really need the reminder that you are human and can have needs too?"

Steve shrugged.

"Maybe. Or I needed to meet with someone I don't work with and who didn't have any expectations about me."

Stiles gave him an incredulous look.

"I am in a really known team."

"Dude, I knew from the beginning that you were an avenger. Your face is everywhere!"

Steve too a step back at that.

"What?"

"Steve, for someone not to recognize you, they have to live under a rock for years!"

"But you… You…"

"What?"

"You didn't do anything. You just…treated me like I was anyone. Even if you knew…"

Stiles laughed.

"Dude, it's difficult to see a superhero as anything other than another guy having a rough time when you can literally experience his emotions. You are just another human being, Steve."

Steve had his mouth opened and couldn't seem to be able to close it, causing Stiles to laugh again.

"Ok. So when I'll feel better, we will discuss this talent of yours. But… For the moment I just want to… thank you."

"What for?"

"Well, you are here for me. And you didn't do anything to make profit of… me and my problems. And you treated me like a human being. And you… You let me vent without telling me you already knew, I guess. For all of that."

"No problem. Everyone would have make the same in my position."

"No, I can assure you that you are the only one outside of my team that ever treated me like a normal person since I woke up."

"Well, this world is fucked up and I am amazing, what can I say!"

He laughed again. Steve realized that this laughing attitude was not that far from his own façade of seriousness. A way to keep the world away not to be hurt by it.

"Well, if you ever want to tell me more about this boy and his adventure, I would gladly listen and learn how he made it after his decision."

"I might. But, for the moment, are you feeling better?"

"Yes, as you can probably tell. I think I might try and take the time to really evaluate where I stand before taking any decision. Maybe talk with some of them. It's what I would have recommended you to do, if our role were reversed." They walked some more before parting ways, talking about nothing, from Stiles work to Steve appreciation of Star Wars and air conditioning.

And as he returned to his flat, Stiles took his phone out and dialed a familiar number. After two rings, it's answered.

"Stiles? How are you?"

"Derek, I'm fine. Just wanted to hear about you and, you know, swap stories. It's been a while since we did that. It gets lonely without you around here. I thought you might forgot about me, being the alpha, a dad, and keeping an eye on my dad. What would you say about having me in your territory for a couple days next week? I miss you and the little beauty that is my niece."


End file.
